Are you worried that your partner might be using dating sites to meet new people? Nowadays, it's common for people to use dating apps to find potential partners.
But this can also cause problems in relationships. If you're feeling uneasy about your partner's behavior, talk to them and find out the truth. You deserve to be in a relationship based on trust and honesty.
Thankfully, the internet can help you find out if your partner is using dating sites or other websites.
So, don't worry too much. Finding out the truth won't be too hard. Let's work together to find the answers you need.
Here are the 6 most effective ways to find out if your partner is using dating apps/sites:
1. Talk to your partner
Infidelity statistics have shown an increase in the number of infidelities that occur due to the use of dating apps/sites.
Having a concern that your partner might be using dating apps is almost normalized these days.
One of the most secure ways to find out if your partner is on a dating site/app in a healthy relationship is to ask your partner about it.
Talk to them and see where they’re standing in the relationship.
A few good questions to start such a conversation:
- “I’d like to know where our relationship is headed, that’s why I’m curious to know if you’re still using dating apps or not.”
- “I have a feeling you’re using dating apps… Would you mind helping me clear up my thoughts?”
- “I don’t mean to start an argument but I need you to help me clear up some thoughts in my head… Are you using dating apps?”
The one common point these examples make is a calm approach instead of storming comments that’d lead your partner to have defensive behavior.
Oftentimes, when you trigger your partner’s defensive behavior you also push them into avoiding the truth.
This often stems from the fear they have of your possible reaction to the truth.
So, if you choose the first method to find out if your partner (boyfriend, girlfriend, or even spouse) is using dating apps, make sure you have a calm approach to the conversation.
2. Check the partner's personal devices
If you don’t trust your partner, and they’re showing particularly secretive behavior then you can check their devices to find out if they’re using dating apps.
This is not a healthy way to find out the truth you’re looking for, however, in most scenarios it removes doubt.
Once you got your partner’s personal devices you’ll be looking for the:
- A dating app icon on their home screen.
- A dating site on their browser history.
- A secret folder on their home screen.
The dating app icons and names are generally easy to spot and understand their purpose. In this case, you won’t have a hard time recognizing one.
If you can't spot a dating app icon on their home screen you can check their browser history and check for a secure folder.
Once you check their browser history (Chrome, Safari, etc) you’ll be able to see any dating site appear if they’ve been using any.
Another important thing to note is the time that they’ve been using the site on their browser.
Check the dates to not have any misunderstanding of the situation.
You want to avoid accusing them of using dating sites while you weren’t together. That’d be absurd. So, check the dates too.
DON’T FORGET THE DATES!
A secure folder allows you to hide pictures, files, and apps on it. It’s essentially a folder with a password in which you put anything.
An Android Secure Folder icon looks like this:
While an iPhone Secure Folder icon looks something similar to this:
Note:
Vault Apps are pretty popular and can be downloaded on most devices.
Essentially they represent a secure folder in which you ‘lock’ things on your phone to which only you can have access and ‘unlock’ if you want to see them.
3. Use third-party apps to find their profiles
Using third-party apps often costs a particular price to use if you use them to find your partner on a dating app.
The benefit of using third-party apps is that it allows you to search for your partner on any dating app/site out there.
All it takes is writing your partner’s (wife or husband) name in this form and seeing the results:
Once you get your search results you’ll be seeing if your boyfriend or girlfriend has a dating app or a dating site.
Some of those apps include:
One of the most accurate third-party apps for finding someone on dating apps is Socialcatfish.
That’s because it’s not specifically designed for a particular dating app or site, it shows everything, every dating app/site that your partner could be using.
You can search by username on dating sites.
4. Search their name on particular dating apps/use Google
If your partner is on some of the popular dating apps then you can search for your partner’s name on some of those apps.
Unfortunately, most of those very popular apps such as Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, etc. don’t have the option to search for someone specific. You can still know if your boyfriend is on Hinge.
However, you can use a way to search for your partner on Tinder or other apps by using Google.
Searching your partner’s possible dating profile on Google is yet another free method to find out if they’re on online dating platforms.
Since most of the data shown in dating profiles are not public on search engines such as Google, you won’t be able to find your partner’s dating profile by searching their age or location.
What you need to do is search for them on Google similar to this example:
Note: Keep in mind that this works only for dating sites, not apps.
You can also use Google Images.
Grab a few pictures that your partner has on social media and ‘drag and drop’ them on Google Images.
If you’re using your phone then you can use Google Lens.
The point of this search is to give it a try and see if you can find something particular that could indicate your spouse/partner is on dating apps/sites.
5. Create a false account on popular dating apps/sites
If you're not sure which dating app your partner might be using, you might consider trying out some popular dating apps. This can be a clever way to figure out if your boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse is using a dating app.
Here's what you can do:
- First, go to the dating app or website you suspect they might be using. Some common ones are Tinder, Match, or Bumble.
- Create a fake profile on that app or site.
- Adjust the settings on the fake profile to make it easier to find your partner. For example, if your partner is 35 years old, set your age preferences to 31-36 or 30-35.
- You can also set a minimum distance from your partner's location. This will help narrow down the search.
- Begin swiping through profiles and keep an eye out for your partner's profile. This method doesn't cost anything, but it could potentially cause problems in your relationship.
If your partner has similar doubts about you, this might provide the confirmation they were seeking.
Be careful and understand the potential risks as you go through with this method.
Always talk openly with your partner and address any concerns or problems together. Communication is key in any relationship.
6. Ask a friend for help: keep an eye on the profiles while they swipe
A lot of people have found out their partner is cheating with a little help from a good friend.
If you have single friends who are using dating apps they could help you save quite a lot of effort and money on this one.
Once (and if) your friend finds your partner’s dating profile while swiping, there are three things they can do:
- Share your partner’s profile link with you.
- Screenshot your partner’s profile and send it to you.
- Swipe right to see if the profile is still active.
A lot of dating apps/sites give you the option to share a profile with others.
If your friend finds the dating profile of your partner they can share the link with you so you can see it for yourself and keep it as proof.
The screenshots are good enough proof as well. Just make sure your friend screenshots everything that’s on the profile.
On the other hand, swiping right on your partner’s dating profile can help you find out if the dating profile is active or not.
It’s important that your friend shares ‘the news’ with you, it’ll be enough to help you get rid of the doubts in your head.
What to do if you find out your partner is on dating apps/sites?
Finding out that your partner is using dating apps can be a difficult experience. Even if you had suspicions or a gut feeling about it, the actual confirmation can come as a surprise.
You may have hoped that you wouldn't find anything, but the reality hits you hard.
There are three main things you can do in this situation:
- Talk to your partner about it. Although it can be a tough conversation to have, address the issue. Take some time to calm down before approaching your partner, as it can be overwhelming to process your emotions all at once. This conversation may help you understand why your partner did what they did, and could provide some closure.
- Make a decision. Take some time to think about what you want to do next. It can be challenging to reconcile your feelings of betrayal with your attachment to your partner. Ultimately, make a decision that feels right for you.
- Seek therapy or couples therapy. Whether you decide to stay in the relationship or move on, therapy can be a helpful tool. It can provide insight into your emotions, help you process what happened, and guide you through the process of rebuilding trust and love.
Take your time and prioritize your well-being during this process.
Why is my partner using dating apps/sites?
Some people consider the behavior of having a dating profile while in a relationship to be inappropriate, while others think it's acceptable. The reason for this difference in opinion is based on the reasoning behind the behavior.
If you have found your partner's dating profile, there are typically three main reasons why they may be using it:
- They are actively looking for someone else to date or hook up with. This is a clear violation of trust and there is little excuse for this behavior.
- They are seeking validation from others outside of the relationship, wondering if they would still be desirable if they were single. This need for validation can lead to problems in the relationship, even if it wasn't the original intention.
- They may have forgotten to properly delete their dating account after leaving the app, resulting in an inactive profile that still appears on the app.
If you want to know if your partner's dating profile is still active, you can check for a recent picture on their profile, if you have matched with them, or if there is a green dot indicating that they are currently online.
Finding your partner on a dating app…
Knowing that your partner is using a dating app or site takes 6 ways:
- Talking to them.
- Checking their devices.
- Using third-party apps.
- Searching for them on Google.
- Creating a false account on dating apps.
- Asking for help from friends that are using online dating platforms.
Except for third-party apps, the rest of these ways to find out your partner is on dating apps/sites are for free and don’t cost you to try them out.
You’ve got this!
Best of luck,
Liam
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