She stopped texting back! Insecurities and impatience joined the room, along with questions such as:
“Why did she stop texting? Is she not interested?”
“How long do I wait to text her again? What do I even say this time?!”
What a party! Seen before? Yes. Done before? Absolutely!
First of all, just because she stopped texting it doesn’t mean she’s not interested. You’ll find out why.
And second of all, there are things you can do and say that work to get her attention back.
Buckle up handsome! We’re driving to a place called COMPREHENSION.
You’ll Read About
- 10 reasons why she isn’t texting back
- What can you do to make her text you back? +Tips
- Things you’re doing wrong and how to prevent them
- How long do I wait to text her again? The perfect time.
Why Didn’t She Text Back? When To Say What?
Read the article carefully to find out which of these resonates most with you.
Here you’ll find the 10 probable reasons why she’s not texting you back, or why she’s not texting you back anymore, and solutions to each of them.
You managed to get her number; congratulations handsome!!
Buuut, now she’s not replying and that’s bad news because you really liked her.
10 possible reasons she didn’t text you back:
- She’s confused.
- You were impatient… and needy.
- She’s not interested.
- You waited too long to ask her out.
- She got bored.
- You’re overdoing compliments.
- She’s busy.
- She’s playing THAT game.
- She’s not ready.
- She’s still not sure about it.
What Did I Do Now, Did I Scare Her? What Do I Do Next?
- You confused her, now you can….
To put it simply: your intentions weren’t clear.
She gave you her number, but she still has no idea what you want from her. This makes her want to keep her distance with you.
But why? Why does this make her want to keep her distance with me?
- You give her the feeling that you’re keeping her as a backup.
As in, when you’re bored and have nothing to do, you’ve got her number and text her to escape the boredom you’re in. Women hate that!
- You make her feel played.
Today you flirt with her, the next day you’re begging to be friendzoned.
Did I hear someone yell “mixed signals”?
Oh, yes. It was common sense! Grow up, Ryan.
If you didn’t get the point, this means: she’s tired of your sh*t because you keep confusing her.
What can I do about it?
First, you’ll have to come up with something creative to grab her attention and start a conversation.
- You can text her about some news about a certain thing that she likes so much. Here, examples:
“Erica, I had to share this with you! The rare Saturn and Jupiter conjunction is happening on the 21st of this month!”
“Erica, I know you’d be happy to hear this. Hans Zimmer’s Europe tour isn’t canceled, it’s just postponed to 2022!”
- You can send her a song/meme/gif/cool video about something.
Let’s say you send her a song, here’s what you can say:
“Erica, they just posted it and I had to let you know cause I know how much you like them.”
After you start the conversation you can:
- Ask her how she’s been doing while you haven’t been in touch.
- Start being clearer about your intentions.
- Show her you’re interested.
- Flirt (not too much, not too little. Just enough).
Tip: Try to take things easy. Show her you like her, but not scare her away.
- Steps to follow if you were impatient… and needy.
Your needy side kicked in again, and this time it didn’t knock, this time it destroyed the door and got in uninvited.
It is out there. She saw this side of you. And it is completely okay.
You texted her once, she didn’t reply.
Let me guess what happens after a few hours… you texted her again? Damn it Ryan!
- You’ll seem like you’ve got no life, and that is a bit of a turn off.
- I know that you like her a lot and can’t keep it to yourself, but this might annoy her enough to not text you again. Ever.
- Your self-respect becomes invisible in this case.
What can I do about it?
If you’ve been constantly texting her, it might be a bit difficult to get her attention because you can seem desperate.
Tip: Try to work with yourself on this part. Try to find out where it is coming from, and what you can do about it.
However, you can give it a try by following these steps:
- Give it some time. Wait for a few weeks or so.
- Text her. Ask her about something in particular. Like:
“I wanted to ask you about [place], I’m thinking of going there, but haven’t decided yet. What do you think?”
- When she replies, don’t reply immediately; when you do, reply in short sentences.
It’ll make her curious, and that’s a good thing.
- Don’t mention anything about her not replying to you.
- Try to keep the conversation going, but do not push it that much if she replies in a cold way.
Note: If you think there’s no way you can improve on this part (your neediness), then you might want to think of finding someone that’ll accept it.
- She’s (probably) not interested. What can you do about it?
How do I know she’s not interested?
If she didn’t tell you straightforwardly, then there are pure signs she’s not interested (that you cannot see because you like her so much).
- She doesn’t reply after you texted her a few times.
- When she finally replies after days, she replies with very, very short answers.
- She doesn’t accept the call/s.
Whatever the case is if she’s interested she will not take long to reply.
We find ourselves carrying our phones everywhere we go.
They [phones] are pretty f*cking simple to use. It takes a few seconds to send a text. No biggie!
She’s not texting you for weeks/months? She’s not interested.
If she’s not interested, then why did she give me her number?
Well, there are a few answers to that:
- She didn’t want to make you feel bad so she gave you her number. (it seemed the right thing to do at the moment)
- She felt the spark at the moment, but she isn’t feeling it right now.
Her eyes sparkle while she writes her number down, you’re both oh so happy… The next day, she might just not feel it?
Considering that women tend to follow their emotions more than men do, this is not very surprising because it happens a lot.
- She wanted to avoid explaining why she doesn’t feel like giving you her number.
She wants to avoid explaining why she won’t give you her number, so she’ll deal with it easier by ignoring your texts.
Note: This does not mean that you’re unattractive. It only means you’re not her type/ she’s not yours.
What can I do about it?
Let’s drop the bullsh*t and face it.
If this is the case for you pal, then you need to move on. Seriously!
I don’t care how much you liked her. You texted her once, you texted her twice, 3 times, she left you on read and didn’t reply.
Move on. Eventually, if her interest for you comes back, you might or might not be still available, but at least you’re respecting her what is called space.
Could Be Something That You Said/Did
Thankfully we’re human beings and not gods, therefore we don’t have to be perfect. I mean we can try, but still it is a french no.
You’re “humaning” and of course at times it might not go as well as you think it does/should.
Whether it was on proper Tinder, on whatsapp, it doesn’t matter what form of communication, you did something she didn’t like.
- You waited too long to ask her out… Let’s finally do this right!
This is very similar to number 1 (you confused her).
Want to have a clearer idea? Imagine this:
You’re in a restaurant. You ordered your food, and you can see it getting prepared to be served on your table, it even has your name close to the plate.
The waiter is now walking towards you. You smell the delicious food, you see how amazing it looks. Boy! You cannot wait to start eating…
All of a sudden the distance between you and the waiter keeps getting longer and longer, even though he’s walking towards you.
You get a feeling that the food you want so bad is never going to arrive; of course, you walk out and go elsewhere because you’re starving.
Now, I know it can be difficult to find the right timing.
Still, you have to ask her out before she starts feeling that the food isn’t ever going to reach her table.
What can I do about it?
She’s been interested in quite a while since you’ve texted before. The chances are, she’s still interested, she’s just tired of waiting.
Text her something that’ll get her attention
If it has been days since she didn’t text back text her something like:
“It’s been a long time. How have you been, Erica?”
“Haven’t heard from you in a while. How are you, Erica?”
Eventually, during the conversation do let her know you’d like to see her in the flesh.
You can send her something like:
And add: “I’d say [the date you wish to take her out]. Because it’s been too long, and I know I should’ve asked you earlier.”
Tip: If you’ve ever had a phone call before, then you can call her and casually ask her how she’s doing. Then you can mention that you’d like to see her in person.
P.S. If you have no idea what to do on the first date, check out 10 Best First Tinder Date Ideas.
- You bored her. Time to step up the game, fella!
She texts you with excitement and interest. You reply with things such as: “Good.”, “Cool.”, “Oh, nice.”. How dare you, sir?!
You two have been texting for a while now, if she was the only one ‘carrying’ the conversation then I’m afraid I have bad news for you: she got bored.
She asks you questions, you answer them shortly and don’t bother to ask her back.
She will get bored, she will also think you’re not that much interested.
Cool. What can I do about it?
I understand that there are people that aren’t as excited about things compared to others.
I’m not going to tell you to pretend to be excited about stuff you’re not excited about.
But there are things you can do to improve your situation:
- Show her you’re interested by asking questions about her.
- Engage more in the conversation.
- Don’t play the cold one.
- Don’t be afraid to ask questions
Before you go on with conversations, you need to make her reply first by using a good line or picture/gif (a meme or something similar), like:
Tip: Let her know you’re putting more effort into the conversation by not answering in short words such as: nice, good, cool, etc. Get creative, you know.
- You’re overdoing compliments. Why is it such a bad idea?
A nice and meant compliment here and there is always a good idea.
She can tell the difference between a compliment that’s meant for her, and a compliment that’s meant for her AND 12 other women (that also didn’t fall for that bs).
Whatever your intention is, this isn’t going to work.
But everyone loves compliments, why is this a bad idea?
- It is a bad idea because you’ll look fake.
Most probably this isn’t her first encounter with someone that showers her with compliments to get something back from her (it can be anything, really).
As a smart ass that she is, of course she’ll notice.
What can I do about it?
You’re not completely hopeless. Because you can do it right, and get her to start texting again with you.
If she left you on read, and it’s been a while since she didn’t reply to your text then:
- Don’t text her for a few days (a week or so).
- When you text her, send her a picture(of a topic she’s interested in) that you know will blow her mind. Or text her something like:
“Did you know that Nasa has this website in which everyday they post a ‘picture of the day’? I just found out, and I couldn’t help but tell you ‘cause I know you like such stuff.”
“… cause I know you like such stuff.” She’ll know you pay attention to her personality too. Women appreciate that.
- Next time you want to be careful with those compliments buddy.
Don’t say them compliments unless you mean them.
Tip: Next time you give compliments, try to avoid the generic ones. Focus on the details you like about her that make her unique.
It’s Not You, It’s Her
Surprisingly there are also reasons that don’t have much to do with something you did or said. It’s just… her.
- She’s too busy to reply.
She’s got a life, right? She’s working, she’s traveling, she’s doing this, she’s doing that. SHE’S BUSY!
Let’s say she does so many things that she completely forgot that some guy named Ryan in fact, does exist. Sorry, Ryan.
- She’s so busy that at the end of the day she gets tired and forgets to reply to you.
Thankfully she doesn’t have any idea that you’re out there telling your friends “Omg she left me on seen!” because that would roughen her agenda for realsies.
- She’s so busy that she doesn’t have time to tell you that she’s… well, busy.
Though, once again, it is super easy to reply to a text these days. It only takes a few seconds. But still, it depends on what she does during the day.
Tip: Wait till she replies. Don’t be impatient.
- She’s playing THAT game, you know the one.
Yes, the “hard to get” game, the “you have to earn it” game, THAT game.
People that we like and don’t show much signs they like us back drive us crazy, and it makes us curious (because, of course, why wouldn’t anyone like us).
It’s in our genes; we’re curious, and we want attention.
Of course, she knows about it, that’s why you’re reading this article – it [her game] is obviously working.
What can I do about it?
This means she’s quite interested and is wanting your attention (perhaps badly). Here’s what you can do:
- Be forward.
- Write such lines that she can’t help but reply.
- Ask questions, the interesting ones!
Here, a winner:
Tip: Ask questions that provoke her critical thinking, not just questions that make her talk about herself only.
- She’s not ready.
If you’ve got her number (it doesn’t matter when) and she’s not texting back, then it could be that she’s not ready yet.
Maybe she thought she was but then realized it during the way that she’s not really ready to start something.
Whether it is her career or a past relationship that she’s not over yet or her current emotional state, it takes time.
It could be anything that makes her feel not ready to dedicate her time to you.
Tip: Give her space and the time she needs. Don’t be pushy.
- She’s still not sure about it.
This is the case in which she needs her time to think before she jumps in.
It can be a single well written line that will make her make up her mind.
It can also be a single horribly written line (or a horrible picture – a picture of your Lil’ Billy) that will make her make up her mind (NOT in your favor).
What can I do about it?
The first of the firstests: DO NOT send her pictures of your Lil’ Billy!
Now that that’s out of the way we can move on with other things.
- Be patient. Don’t text her very often.
- Get creative and show her you’re worth her time.
- Once again for god sake, resist the temptation to send THAT picture.
- If she tells you she needs time, respect it and don’t be pushy.
Tip: Find ways to prove to her you’re not like everyone else: ask unique questions, share thoughts on topics that require balls to discuss them.
What to do if…
- She didn’t text back after a date?
There are a lot of different reasons why a girl doesn’t text you after a date.
The best ways to find out:
- Call her. Tell her that you had a good time, and that you’d like to see her again.
She’ll then let you know whether she’d like to continue any further or not.
- Text her. Here, some lines if you have no idea what to say:
“Erica, didn’t hear from you again. Last night I had a great time with you, and I’d love to see you again. Of course, if you’re into the idea too.”
“Well, I think I waited long enough. I had an amazing time, and I’d like to see you again Erica.
“Erica, it was amazing meeting you. I’m curious to know what did you like from the date, and what didn’t you like from the date.
Tips on how to create your own unique lines:
- Point out a certain detail you liked about her. Be as specific as possible.
- Tell her you’d like to take her to a certain place (or do a certain activity) she mentioned she’d like to see (or do).
- Tell her you forgot to ask her things and ask them through text.
- If she mentioned a movie/song she likes that you didn’t see/hear, watch it/listen to it and let her know you did. Also, let her know your thoughts on it.
If she doesn’t text after two to three days, you can try just once more.
If she still doesn’t text back, then most probably she’s not interested anymore and she’s not knowing how to tell you.
- She didn’t text back for days?
Depends on the reason she hasn’t been texting.
Whether it has been weeks or just a few days, it is a good idea to not be pushy and to not constantly text her.
- Send her a song with a message like:
“I just heard it, and it made me think of you. How have you been?”
- Send her a picture you’ve seen on the internet that you know she’ll like, with a message like:
“It instantly reminded me of you. Now I know why you’d like to visit [place] that much.”
- Text her something simple. If she’s interested she’ll reply.
You can go with something like:
“Erica, it’s been a while. How are you?”
“Erica, haven’t heard from you in a while. How have you been?”
Whichever of the options you choose. If she doesn’t text back, then it’s time to move on.
- She didn’t text me all day?
Here’s what you can do:
- Be patient.
- Text her. If you normally text every day and this is coming out of nowhere you can text her:
“Is everything ok?”
“Just checking if everything’s alright.”
Or something else, like:
- Send her a picture. If this happens more often, then you can send her a picture making fun of the fact that she didn’t reply:
- I texted her 3 times and she didn’t reply?
Doesn’t matter if she read your texts or not, DO NOT text her again.
This time you want to wait for her reply because you did your part.
If she doesn’t text back. Don’t try again, move on, she’s not interested.
General things that usually work:
- Make fun of the fact that she didn’t text in a while.
You can text her something funny about the fact that she’s been gone.
Also, you can get creative and:
Send her a meme
Send her a gif
Tip: Don’t overdo it. Just one simple line, or one meme, or one gif.
- Be quiet for some time.
If you texted her say 2 times, and she didn’t reply. Then just don’t text her anything in 3 weeks or so. You know, self respect?
If she cares she will notice and maybe then take the time to reply to you.
If she doesn’t care to reply again, I’d say move on, but if you really like her that much you can try just once more.
If again, she doesn’t text back then you gotta move on for good buddy.
Tip: If she texts you during the ‘silent’ time, try to act casual and don’t mention the fact that she’s been gone.
- Call her in a casual way.
If you’ve done phone calls before, then calling her and just asking how she is, it’s a good idea.
If you texted her and she didn’t reply that day, DO NOT call her or text her until after a few days.
When you talk on the phone it is easier for the conversation to flow, if she’s interested you will continue texting.
- Don’t rush it, and be patient.
- Give her time, wait for a few days.
- Get creative when you text her.
- Get ready to move on, if she doesn’t reply.
Doesn’t matter how busy she is, what game she’s playing.
She’s interested, she’ll reply. She’s not interested, she will not reply or when she does she’ll barely do so.
“But she’s different!”
It’s been 84 years Ryan! Move on already for f*ck’s sake.