What are the dos and don’ts for men and women when texting after the date?
Congrats!! Whether the date went good, or bad, doesn’t matter. Congrats on putting yourself out there!
It went good or bad, you’re a man or a woman, none of that matters: You text them after the date.
The main question here is “What?”; What to text after the first date?
We’ve crafted first-date text message examples for any situation you’re in. A first date can bring a lot to a table, we all know that for sure!
Let’s get that second date! …Or avoid it, if that’s the situation for you.
So, what do you text a girl or anyone after the first date?
Text After the First Date Examples: What Do I Send Them to Let Them Know I’m Interested?
You can send them your friends’ suggestions, but I’m pretty sure you’ve got a good reason you’re here.
These are a few general, and specific lines to send them if your date went awesome and you feel like dancing just because.
Let’s cha-cha-cha, shall we?
11 General Text Examples to Send Them
You can send them your friends’ suggestions, but I’m pretty sure you’ve got a good reason you’re here.
We leveled up a notch on the“Thank you” and “I had an amazing time” texts.
You can send them if your date went awesome and if “I’m dancing because I feel like dancing, not because my date went amazing!”
Let’s cha-cha-cha, shall we?
1.“Thank you for an amazing evening! Let me know you arrived safely.”
This is the most general text you can send them if you don’t want to be too extra.
You let them know you had a good time, and you let them know you care.
I had a date with this wonderful woman once and a few hours after the date I found myself trying to come up with a text that’s not nerdy.
The train of my thoughts got hit by the sound of a text on my phone:
“Hey, I just wanted to make sure you made it home… Did you?”
If you’re still thinking about it… You go text him, girl!
2. “What a beautiful date! Thank you for sharing such a wonderful time with me.”
This is good to send a few hours after the date.
You want to build the excitement, and finally let them know you’re thinking about them.
It’s not a game that you’re playing, it’s not something mean that you’re doing. It is simply a way to make things more exciting.
It’ll then give you both more material to use to keep the conversation going in a fun way.
You’ll take the first step and you’ll open the door for a second-date discussion along the conversation.
3. “Time flew so fast. I’d love to do this again with you sometime.”
You let them know you had an awesome time with them, and you thank them, but you also want to let them know that you’re interested to see them again, and have other things you’d like to try with them.
This way, you build up curiosity and excitement by letting them wonder about the next date.
4. “I was thinking about what you said about Star Wars… I don’t know what you’ve done to me, but hell, I’m starting to get your point.”
This one is quite simple. Doesn’t matter if you’re a woman texting a man, or vice versa, or a woman texting a woman, or a man texting a man… You feel it, you say it.
By mentioning something that they told you about, you indirectly let them know that you listened, and most importantly thought about what they said.
It’s a very good way of starting the conversation and seeing where it leads to, all of this, naturally and unforced.
5. “I heard that if you have a good time on a first date, chances are you’ll have a good time on the second one too. Wanna find out if that’s true next week?”
A bit flirty, a bit playful, and a bit more relaxed. This text is one of my favorites.
You’re pretty straightforward about it – You want to ask them on a second date, hence you do so with a touch of playfulness to your tone.
This text will give them the “we’re in this together” type of feeling. It’ll make room for funny things to talk about once you’re on the second date.
You’re welcome, very, very, welcome.
6. “What an amazing way to end the week! I’d love to see you again. Is next Friday fine with you?”
Another line for ladies and gentlemen.
If you’ve had a rough week and you told your date about it, which is becoming a normal and common picture in the dating world, this would be the perfect text.
You were exhausted, but the date made you forget about the rest of the week, and this will make your date feel good about it.
They had a good time themselves, but they also saved someone else’s day.
It’s a win-win situation.
7. “I like your way of explaining things and the way you listen, it’s a rare find. I like you, really.”
It shows that you pay attention and you listen when they’re talking. You’re interested and curious about things that they like and they don’t like.
Next good thing is that you’re complimenting them on a detail that is likely to not be noticed by other people.
You’re making them feel special, which sets your connection off to a great start.
8. “I’m happy we chose to go [activity], I had so much fun! Is there something you’d like to do next time we meet?”
Now, this is some type of next level. Letting them do a little work and stuff, ya know.
In other words, you’re saying “I had so much fun! But now I want to let you pick what we’re gonna do next.”
Give them space to pick something they enjoy, something they feel comfortable with.
In most heterosexual dating scenes, the guy is usually the one who picks the places, or the activities.
Why not ask her what she would like to do next time?
9. “Being in your company was absolutely lovely! Thank you.”
This is a wonderful “Thank you” text after a first date.
It’s simple and plain, yet it’s very beautiful and helps those butterflies really settle in.
It’s a compliment followed by a genuine expression of gratitude.
It absolutely makes room for the conversation to keep going as you both start pointing out the things you like about the date and the time you spent together.
10. “I think you put a spell on me… I can’t sleep.”
This one is more ‘appropriate’ if you two are somewhat closer to one another, and if you feel free to express things you wouldn’t with just anyone.
It’s likely to lead to a conversation in which you can ask them for a second date if you feel like it.
Doesn’t matter if you’re a lady or a gentleman. If you feel like you can’t get them out of your head, let them know.
Chances are this is mutual, it’s just they’re being hesitant like you are.
11. “I just realized that you remind me of [name of song] by [artist]”
A girl once did this for me, and I was obsessed with the song for days.
We didn’t work out, but even now when I hear it, it gives me a good feeling and it reminds me of her.
You want to be careful though.
You don’t want to send them songs like “Someone Like You” by Adele. You had your first date, it’s not gonna make much sense.
You want to keep a balance. Find that one song that reminds you of them, and send it to them with a cute message.
Eventually, it’ll become their song, and no matter how things go, one way or another it’ll also remind them of you. It’s a nice thing to do.
12. “I’d love to not only see your beautiful face again but to also hear more of what you have to say on [topic].”
We all know how compliments get the conversations and connections going on. The good chills, the good talks.
This shows you were attentive throughout the date.
You acknowledge the fact that you find them physically attractive, yet you don’t focus entirely on their physical attributes.
By adding that “[…] hear more of what you have to say on [topic].” you let them know that you’re curious about their viewpoints as well.
13. Send them an image related to something you talked about and add “I knew I’d find it!”
Whether it is a movie, a song, a meme, or a gif, anything really.
It’ll let them know you listened, and you care enough to share with them something that reminded you of your conversation.
On the other hand, this is a very smooth way of starting a conversation and letting it flow naturally.
As you talk further on, don’t forget to thank them for the amazing time you’ve had!
More Text Examples When the First Date Goes Well: Texts to Send Them If You Kissed
Alriiiight, now we’re talking! Smoochie smoochie! We’ve come to another important question of the day:
What to text your date after you shared the first kiss with them?
It’s not about who should text after the first kiss, it’s about what to text. Honestly, whatever your gender, you should just go for the text!
Here’s what to text a girl after kissing her, or a boy, or however they identify as:
14. “I’ll say it again, you’re an amazing kisser!”
You told them once, but you want to tell them again.
You’re confident about it, and you want to tell them about how impressed you are by their smooching skills. It is indeed a nice and simple compliment.
Example:
15. “You’re genuinely an amazing kisser. I had a wonderful time with you. Thank you!”
This is one of those sweet texts that give you a good type of chills.
You don’t have to necessarily mention the fact that you kissed right away, you can do that later on in the conversation.
Let them know you enjoyed the kiss.
Winners:
16. “I’m tasting this sweetness on my lips and I’m telling myself it’s the chocolate, but deep down, I know it’s you.”
If you’re not into the ordinary, then this will do for you.
Why not send them something that includes chocolate and kissing in the same sentence?
Yummy! It’ll make them smile, it’ll give them the good chills, and it’ll remind them of how bad they want to see you again.
And now the example:
17. “Are you free this Friday? I can’t wait to meet you again… and kiss you! Gosh! I can’t wait to kiss you again!
You really have to mean this one. If they’re not that good of a kisser but you liked them a lot, you might want to choose a ‘calmer’ text.
If it is mutual, they’ll appreciate your enthusiasm, and it’ll get them more enthusiastic to see you this Friday.
18. “You know, you’re an amazing kisser. Buuut, I’m not sure if your lip balm was cherry or strawberry, it’s really messing up with my head :P”
This is for my playful fellas. You can twist it a little as you wish, the important thing is that you get the point.
You let them know they’re an amazing kisser, you hit them with the ‘buuut’ and then finally bring them back with ‘I’d love to kiss you again’ said in other playful words.
What to Text After A Bad First Date?
I understand that you don’t want to make them feel bad, and want to find the best way to let them know you’re not interested.
It is easier than you think.
Here, are texts to politely let them know you’re not interested after the first date:
19. “Hi [name]. I think you’re an amazing person, but I just don’t see us as a good match. I wish you the best!”
This is for the ones that don’t like explaining too much. It is short yet straightforwardly simple and polite.
‘I wish you the best’ will let them know you don’t want to keep in touch.
20. “Hello [name], I had an amazing time with you last night, but I didn’t feel the attraction it takes for us to be something more than friends. Thank you very much for sharing your time with me. I wish you the best!”
You’re not telling them it’s something that they did, you’re letting them know that you had a good time with them, but you wouldn’t do the mingly things with them.
Also, it is important that you thank them since they spent time and energy on the date too.
21. “Hey [name], I respect you a lot as a person, I just didn’t feel that we connected enough to continue seeing one another any further. Best of luck to you!”
This is for the ones that kept their distance when out on the date too.
This is suitable for one of those dates in which both of you can’t wait to finish the drinks and get up with an excuse, and both be happy that it ended.
22. “I just wanted to thank you for the date yesterday, but I don’t see this going any further than friendship. I’m sorry and thank you. Good luck, [name].”
This is way too nice for them to want to insist, or keep the conversation going on the “Why don’t you see this going any further than friendship?”.
If you don’t want to contact them again, you might want to send them another text:
23. “Hey [name]. I’m sorry, but I feel it’s fair to let you know that I don’t see us as a good fit for each other. I appreciate you a lot, and I wish you the very best!”
You’re being honest, and not judgemental towards their personality.
Instead, you’re judging the whole situation as complete and you two as an incompatible pair.
24. “I think you’re a wonderful person, but I’ll be honest with you and not mislead you… I can’t provide you with what you’re looking for, I’m sorry.”
If you really liked the person, you showed positive signs, but you didn’t have the courage to let them know you were not interested during the date, then this is the text for you.
You let them know you liked them, yet you let them know that you mean no harm and that there wasn’t anything wrong with them.
When Do I Text Them After The First Date?
I’m guessing you’re reading this a few hours after the date, or the day after the date.
Whether the date went amazing or not as you expected, you’re left replaying everything in your head, telling your friends about it, and not knowing when to shoot that text.
Well, however it went for you, you don’t want to wait too long to text them.
You can wait a day or two, and ideally, you don’t wait for more than that.
You don’t want to rush things either.
If you feel like immediately texting them, feel free to do so. But you might want to wait just a few hours to let the excitement build in.
Let it be natural and unforced. Text them when you feel like texting them, but don’t rush, and don’t wait for more than 2-3 days.
Examples of Clingy Texts: Here’s What You DO NOT Want to Send Them After a First Date
I’m kind of hoping you’re not seeing this too late, otherwise,, you’ll have to check out the: what to do if she didn’t text back?
There are some texts you really want to avoid sending after a first date with someone.
I’m talking about the texts that, perhaps you might not mean to, but show that you didn’t listen to a thing they said and were focused on their looks, or show that you’re very clingy (even if you aren’t, it might come off like that).
The wrong text can give the wrong impression, and scare them away.
Here are some examples of clingy texts you want to avoid sending to someone after the first date:
– “I couldn’t say it while there, but the entire time I was imagining you naked.”
I might get a little concerned if you don’t understand what’s wrong with this line.
I’m afraid this is the type of person to get shadowbanned on Tinder…
I do understand the freedom of your spirit to say whatever comes to your mind, but such a text can just be too soon after a first date.
It shows that you didn’t pay any attention to what they were saying, or didn’t even try to understand them as a person.
That’s why it is on the DO NOT list. The DO NOT list!
– “I bet you’d look amazing without clothes on.”
Another “I don’t care about your personality because I’ve been suppressing my sexual feelings for quite a while now!”
I know we all tend to get a little la-la-la when it’s been a long time ‘without visitors’, but you want to hold it in for a little longer. You can do it pal.
P.S. if you’re this free to communicate with each other, there’s not much wrong with this line, but if straight out of the blue, it’s a scary one.
– “You are my world now.”
Ah! Commitment… too soon buddy.
They can’t be your world in just a date. If they are, you might want to not tell them yet if you want them to keep orbiting around your area.
– “I can see the world in your eyes.”
To put it straightforwardly, this is an unrealistic thing to feel for someone you’ve just met.
It’s cheesy, it’s clingy, and for some, it can even be scary.
Save these romantic texts for later in the connection. Keep it real and pragmatic if you’re looking for something real!
What If They Don’t Want a Second Date With Me?
Dating on Tinder during a pandemic, especially during a pandemic, seems like a pretty good idea until your date ghosts you, or refuses to go on a second date with you.
Well, you know what? It’s easier than you think!
“Let them go to hell!” is what a friend once told me.
But, at some point, we too were not interested in going out with someone that was interested in us.
So, let’s put this into somewhat diplomatic words: ‘Let them go’.
- Accept it. It is not you, it is both of you.
- Don’t keep it going with questions. You’ll hurt yourself worse.
- Respect their decision/opinion.
- Carry on. Get on Tinder or something.
- Thank them for their time, and wish them good luck. Here:
“I understand. I feel the same way. Have a nice life [name]!”
“I see. It’s been a pleasure to know you [name].”
“Okay, no worries. Good luck to you too!”
Make sure you know Tinder Etiquette and other rules before you get Tinder. A Tinder ban isn’t the next thing we’re looking for, isn’t it Rupert?
Dating isn’t easy for anyone these days. We’re in this together.
You’ve got this!
Sincerely,
Liam
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