There are things you should do and things you shouldn’t do on Tinder.
This is no royalty we’re talking about, but Tinder does have etiquette.
It’s about your activity, your behavior, the way you treat your matches, and even about who should message first on Tinder.
How do you know you’re choosing the right/wrong bio or the right/wrong photos?
How do you know you’re swiping correctly, could do anything wrong at that too?
What is Tinder Etiquette?
Tinder Etiquette is a conventional list of things that are acceptable to do and things that aren’t acceptable to do when using Tinder.
There are things that it’d be nice to do, and things that it wouldn’t be very nice to do on Tinder.
The nice things are likely to get you more matches, more dates, and love, while the not-nice things are things that’ll get you reported and no matches.
So, essentially, Tinder Etiquette is a list of dos and don’ts when it comes to using Tinder.
What are the Dos and Don'ts on Tinder? The Ultimate Tinder Etiquette!
As you already understood, to be successful on Tinder, there are things that you can do, and things you can’t do on Tinder.
This is when it comes to your profile, when swiping, matches and unmatches, texting, and dating.
Buckle up! Cause you’re about to read something interesting!
Here are the dos and don’ts on Tinder, the Ultimate Tinder Etiquette:
– Put effort into your profile, dear Tinder user. Effort.
You want to put effort into your profile if you want to get those matches. You do that by carefully choosing your pictures, and writing a nice, original bio.
– Be original.
Sometimes you get this urge to steal lines that were cool back in 2007 and put them on your 2023 Tinder profile. Well, resist the temptation!
You want to keep your profile nice and original.
You can always look for inspiration, but you want to stick to your original ideas and add your own, original spices if you will.
– Show your personality: Don’t catfish.
As mentioned above, having an original profile on Tinder is important. Add your personality flavor to your profile.
Don’t steal lines. Don’t steal pictures. Don’t steal names. DO NOT catfish, kittenfish, or anything of that nature to fool anyone on the app.
– Jokes that infuriate Tinder? Big no-no.
Some people are very much into dark humor. VERY MUCH! They overdo it.
If you’re one of those people, using that type of humor on your profile on Tinder will get you banned.
- Jokes about race or religion.
- Mean jokes that touch certain groups of society.
- ‘Jokes’ about you tending to profit money from your matches.
We like to spice them up sometimes, but in this case, too much of these spices can burn your eyeballs out.
– Choose your anthem.
The type of music a person listens to tells a lot about them. Also, the type of music they decide to share with others tells a lot about them.
In other words, people will get a glimpse of your personality by getting a glimpse of your anthem.
– Pick good quality photos, especially of your face.
Your photos are one of the most important parts of your profile. In most cases, they determine the number of right swipes you’ll get.
You want to be careful when choosing them, make sure they’re good quality and that your face is in them, do not forget the face.
– Don’t overdo the pictures: Put just enough.
If you choose them correctly, a few good pictures are more than enough. You don’t want to overdo it with the pictures.
– Be selective of your group photos.
I know you want to show everyone your awesome friends and the awesome moments you spent with them. But you might want to hold some of those moments to yourself
It is ok to use group photos, and get creative with them. But, you want to use those group photos you like so much just enough to not confuse people about which one is you.
– Do not put just any photo.
I know, I know. It is difficult to not put that picture of your nose on your Tinder profile. But persist against that desire dear Tinder user.
You want to select your pictures. As funny as they might be, you want to avoid pictures like these:
You want to hang on to pictures in which you’re nicely dressed, pictures with good quality, and pictures with different angles.
– Do not put photos with the same pose.
We all have that favorite side of the face, and that is okay. But, it becomes concerning when you put the exact same pose with a different background.
Choose different angles, and different activities, instead of one single face showing one single emotion and side.
– Don’t put your ‘resume photos’
You’re looking straight at the camera with a very straight face, waiting for it to be scanned before you enter a building.
These are your photos with your ‘interview’ face which are also called the ‘resume photos’.
Unless your purpose is to find (or give) a job on Tinder (if it is, you’re in the wrong place!), you don’t want to include those types of photos on your profile.
– DO NOT use fake photos.
A picture of Brad Pitt with the name Ryan under it, is absolutely gonna get those left swipes.
On the other hand, fake photos will get you banned sooner than later.
– Nudes? Bad, bad idea.
Ah, another temptation that requires a high resistance. It depends on who you’re trying to attract but, generally speaking, nudes are a bad, bad idea.
They’re likely to not only get you no matches but also get you reported and banned even.
– Careful with your bio.
Your bio is just as important as your photos. And you want to be careful when deciding what to write and what not to write.
– Write an original/intriguing/funny bio.
If you can’t think of something creative, look on the internet for inspiration, just make sure you don’t copy-paste lines.
– Write your bio based on the people you wish to attract.
Who do you want to attract?
A certain topic that you’d think would attract who you’d like, is generally a good idea.
– Do not put a list of your ‘great achievements/hobbies’ on your bio
Again, you’re not looking for a job on Tinder, aren’t you?
If you want to keep your bio interesting, making a long resume-ish list of things you achieved during the years will not do the work for you.
Jeff, if you’re reading this please do consider editing your bio. Those are a lot of hobbies (plus aren’t limited to the ones mentioned).
– Don’t forget to link your Instagram.
People can see more of you, and it’d be easier for them to get an impression of you before they swipe. So, link your Instagram, why not!
– Read others’ bios before swiping.
That'll give you an idea of the person, and give you material to text them once you match.
You’d save yourself from unmatching them and making them feel bad after you guys matched.
– Be selective of the people you swipe right.
It’s a red flag to Tinder. Plus, if you’re not subscribed to any of Tinder Premium Subscriptions, you’ll have a limited number of likes you give per day.
Use them wisely by choosing the people you like instead of swiping right on every profile you see in front of you without paying any mind to them.
– Don’t swipe right on people you’re not gonna talk to.
What’s the point of a match if you don’t intend to talk to them?
Save your and their time by not swiping right if you don’t intend to text with them.
– Who should be texting first after you’ve got a match on Tinder? You.
Ladies and gentlemen, if you feel like texting them, do it. There’s no such rule as who should text first once you get matched.
However, most women wait for the man to text them first. According to them [women] there is a point in this. It in fact is a made-up rule by society.
There is no rule to it. Whether you’re a man or a woman, just do it. Don’t even question it! Simplify it for yourself and them, and make the first move.
– Do not ghost your matches: avoid unmatching for no reason.
You matched with people. You texted every now and then and just left them waiting. You don’t want them to just ‘decorate’ your shelf of matches.
Be a nice person, and don’t ghost your matches. Instead, be straightforward. Find a way to let them know you wouldn’t like to continue texting.
– Hold your inner peace when unmatched.
Whether someone accidentally swiped you right, or they changed their mind after swiping right, you should accept this as something that happens.
Keep your inner peace, and move on to the next match.
Well, what to say on Tinder and what not to say?
You want to come up with something original and creative l if you want to get a reply.
You can get creative by reading their bios before texting. There’s a lot of material you can find in people’s bios before you text them. Knock yourself out.
– Do not open with stolen pick-up lines.
Oho! A 2010 line to use in 2023 on Tinder. Boy, am I lucky!
You know exactly what I’m talking about. Once again resist the temptation because it’ll repel your matches if you don’t.
– Do not open with ‘hey’
Gosh, don’t open with hey! It shows how little effort you put into it, and how you didn’t bother to read their bio.
Leave that laziness beside and impress someone with your godlike creativity!
– Flirt just enough: don’t overdo it.
People love compliments. A wise compliment here and there, nice flirting is definitely a ‘do’.
You want to flirt just enough so that you don’t seem creepy. Be nice and confident in your game of flirting. Keep in mind, confident, not arrogant.
– Be decent: choose honesty and don’t mislead people.
If you sense that you’ve got different intentions from your match(es) you’ve got to let them know at some point.
It’s not decent to mislead people, especially not fair to waste their time while you know things will lead to a dead end.
Whether it is about dating, just sex, or anything else of your intentions, it is most fair that you be honest with the person you’re texting with.
– Use your sense of humor.
A good sense of humor is very important to keep a chat going. Use it in your questions, your answers, and throughout the conversation.
A nice refreshing sense of humor is very important to keep the conversation going. Here:
– Take it slow with the emojis.
If you like emojis that much no one really has the right to kill your bubbly spirit. Not even on Tinder!
But, if you don’t normally use them, and now you want to catch the attention or get someone attracted to you, overdoing emojis is a terrible idea.
– Don’t be a jerk: Be confident, not arrogant.
There is a thin, very thin line between confidence and arrogance. You can know how awesome you are, but not be a pain in the ass about it. There’s a difference.
You want to be confident in what you represent, but not arrogant about it. Complement your confidence with kindness. Be nice to your matches.
– Be careful with your jokes.
You want to use your amazing sense of humor and be careful with your jokes indeed.
Sometimes they can be offensive without you knowing it. And the next thing you know, you’ve got ghosted/unmatched.
Get to know them before you amaze them with your awesome jokes.
– Be patient: don’t overwhelm your matches with texts.
Be patient and wait for the text in order to not be annoying and make them ghost you.
Also, if you keep texting them and asking why they aren’t replying, it gives the “I’ve got nothing else to do, so I’m waiting for you to give light to my boring life” vibe.
You want to take it easy.
– Check your messages for spelling errors, they can ruin the mood.
Your conversations and the connections you create with people on Tinder are mostly based on the first impressions you give to them.
Texting is an important part of these first impressions. Be thoughtful, check your messages every now and then!
– When to ask for their number?
After a time spent texting on Tinder, it is a sign of interest from your side to ask for their number. Plus, it then gets easier to communicate.
Asking their number is a wonderful idea though you do want to find the right timing.
You do that by seeing how things are moving during the conversation. Make sure you don’t wait too long once you see that spark.
Tinder Etiquette Leveled Up: Matching Someone You Know
Well, you matched! But not just anyone this time.
It is someone you know. Whatever they are to you, and you to them, you both swiped right for one reason or another.
Let’s say you matched your boss…
You most probably swiped right out of curiosity to find out whether they liked you or not, or because you were Liking every single person that appeared on your screen, you animal.
Perhaps they did the same thing. Now, the question is: How do you ‘escape’ this awkward situation?
Do you text them, or do you wait for them to text you?
Your boss, teacher, coworker, cousin, crush from work, the waitress down the street, it could be anyone, really.
Whatever the case, you both got yourselves into this awkwardness.
- What you want to do in this situation is wait. Wait for at least more than a day.
- If they text you, you reply.
- If they don’t text you you can choose to not text them either, or hit them with a simple “Oh, hello there!”
- You can mention it in a funny way the next time you see them at work.
- If possible you can unmatch them in the exact second you matched before they see it.
Here’s a winner from 2015:
It doesn’t necessarily have to be awkward. It could be someone you actually like, and text them something interesting to start a nice conversation.
Tinder Dating Etiquette: What Happens After Tinder?
After Tinder, it’s time for a date. Whether you date one of your matches or all of them, is entirely up to you.
A Tinder First Date Etiquette if you will. Here’s what you consider when you’re practicing dating from Tinder:
– Don’t rush it.
When it comes to going out for a date, you want to take it easy. Do not rush it nor wait too long.
You want to see if you’ve known a bit of one another, and depending on how open you are with one another, you can ask them out.
– Get creative when asking them out.
This depends on what type of connection you’ve got with your match(es).
However, I’d suggest you get creative at this part also. Just creative enough, not too extra.
You can also use gifs, pictures, and memes.
If you’re not that type of person, your own way of using words to express yourself would do just fine.
– Pick a public place for your first date.
It is safe for both of you, especially if you didn’t have a video call before going out (there are a lot of fake tinder profiles out there).
Since you still don’t know each other very well, a place with other people around would be a good idea.
– Pick a fun activity.
Having dinner could be fun too. Ice skating is also a fun thing to do, and an icebreaker.
Find something that both of you would enjoy, and have fun doing it together.
– Be honest about your intentions.
It is a good idea to be clear about whether you simply want sex, a long-term relationship, or whatever your intention might be. It is fair to share it with the person you’re dating.
You’ll know if you’re on the same page or not. Hence it would save you time, both of you.
If you don’t care, don’t pretend that you do. Be honest, find a way to let them know you’re not interested. If you care, do let them know about it.
– Kissing, Sex. Dos or don’ts on the first date?
Well, this would be a whole lot easier to answer once you cleared where you both are standing.
Generally speaking, if you both feel like kissing, go for it. Even sex. If you both feel like doing it, go for it.
If you’re both into it, then it is not even debatable. Knock yourselves out!
– Reach out to them after the date. Yes, even if you’re no longer interested.
Let them know how it was from your side, and what you expect next. Ask them out again if you feel like it.
Unless both of you couldn’t wait to finish the drinks and leave to never see each other again, make sure you text them after the date, even if it’s about letting them know you’re no longer interested.
And there you have it, the Ultimate Tinder Etiquette!
At the end of the day you can do as you please, you little rebel.
…and get a match or two that sooner or later will ghost the hell out of you.